I have been suffering with an all pervasive feeling of being trapped. And in those places where I used to complain, blame or come up with a good distraction or story, I now have just sunk into a deep desperation about my life as it is.
Tonight as I was inquiring into this phenomena I discovered a crazy non dual gem I DON'T WANT WHAT I WANT......no wonder I am feeling trapped and crazy!!!!!
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Friday, May 3, 2013
The laws of life
There always will be problems
And
There always will be thing that have to be done
However
Do not allow these two facts of life distract you from
The peace, love and beauty that is present in every step, in every breath, at every moment of our lives
And
There always will be thing that have to be done
However
Do not allow these two facts of life distract you from
The peace, love and beauty that is present in every step, in every breath, at every moment of our lives
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Why our perceptions are riddled with 'problems'
As I watch my mind and the mind of my family and community, I see there is a greater focus on the perception of problems, rather than the many things in our lives that are not a problem.
Why is that?
When we have so much daily to be grateful for?
As I inquired into this phenomenon I see that what is not perceived as a problem takes no attention to try to 'solve', however when there is a perception of 'not this', we as human beings are inclined to try to rid ourselves of the perceived problem. We feel the need to 'do something' about it.
Where as those things that we take for granted in our life need doing nothing about, they are working fine.
Like breathing this morning, or seeing or walking etc. These things work just fine for me and I rarely notice how wonderful that is but if one of these things started to not work, then I would focus on that as a 'problem' and want to fix/change it.
Basic human nature it seems.
Why is that?
When we have so much daily to be grateful for?
As I inquired into this phenomenon I see that what is not perceived as a problem takes no attention to try to 'solve', however when there is a perception of 'not this', we as human beings are inclined to try to rid ourselves of the perceived problem. We feel the need to 'do something' about it.
Where as those things that we take for granted in our life need doing nothing about, they are working fine.
Like breathing this morning, or seeing or walking etc. These things work just fine for me and I rarely notice how wonderful that is but if one of these things started to not work, then I would focus on that as a 'problem' and want to fix/change it.
Basic human nature it seems.
Monday, April 1, 2013
This pathless path
Dear Mooji....Adja.....OHI people
I get it
There is nothing to do, no where to go
The basic state of my being is always right here, right now with what ever is arising
I get it
I have lost interest in much phenomena that used to consume my life
I have lost motivation for most activities
I am motivated now only by being of benefit to those around me
and by being a basic good steward of my life to care for this body and mind
Life is kind of flat
I am barely interested and somewhat bored and depressed
Where is the joy?
Where is the juice?
in all of this that I see in you?
I get it
There is nothing to do, no where to go
The basic state of my being is always right here, right now with what ever is arising
I get it
I have lost interest in much phenomena that used to consume my life
I have lost motivation for most activities
I am motivated now only by being of benefit to those around me
and by being a basic good steward of my life to care for this body and mind
Life is kind of flat
I am barely interested and somewhat bored and depressed
Where is the joy?
Where is the juice?
in all of this that I see in you?
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Old identity selves dying off
This morning, I am aware of the struggling and fear of the self I formerly thought myself to be.
"I am" watching the self stuggle in fear and rage at illusion.
This illusionary self is fighting with all its life to be real and solid in my reality, but it is too late, increasingly I am free.
Yesterday I had an interesting experience. My car died at in intersection. The car behind me honked and the two young guys swore at me for not going. I only vaguely registered their hostile actions and got out of the car and asked them please to push me out of the intersection. they sprang to life, directing traffic, taking control of the situation and pushed my car to the side of the road. Then they walked away boasting to each other how they had done their good dead for the day. Feeling very good about themselves. I just walked home, calmly eating my sandwich and enjoying the weather.
I had no response to their initial aggression and there was no reaction to the fact that I had a broken car sitting on the side of the road. Absolutely no different than any other thing that could have been happening at that moment.
Its just sort of putting in time , waiting for these old identified 'selves' to wear themselves out. Letting them do what they do untill they get the futility of such energy expended.
"I am" watching the self stuggle in fear and rage at illusion.
This illusionary self is fighting with all its life to be real and solid in my reality, but it is too late, increasingly I am free.
Yesterday I had an interesting experience. My car died at in intersection. The car behind me honked and the two young guys swore at me for not going. I only vaguely registered their hostile actions and got out of the car and asked them please to push me out of the intersection. they sprang to life, directing traffic, taking control of the situation and pushed my car to the side of the road. Then they walked away boasting to each other how they had done their good dead for the day. Feeling very good about themselves. I just walked home, calmly eating my sandwich and enjoying the weather.
I had no response to their initial aggression and there was no reaction to the fact that I had a broken car sitting on the side of the road. Absolutely no different than any other thing that could have been happening at that moment.
Its just sort of putting in time , waiting for these old identified 'selves' to wear themselves out. Letting them do what they do untill they get the futility of such energy expended.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
The delightful display of depression
It is the ....resistance to what is.......that wears me out!!
When I can just accept and allow it all to be as it is.
I am just so fine
Living in Canada, through the dark winter months, feeling the SADS, wearing heavy clothing to be warm, etc, gives many people a feeling of depression with accompanying low energy and like moving through molasses.
When I fight this, I really get wore out, but when I allow it to be, trust the 'what is' of my life as I experience it, where I am....amazingly ...all is delightful in its display
When I can just accept and allow it all to be as it is.
I am just so fine
Living in Canada, through the dark winter months, feeling the SADS, wearing heavy clothing to be warm, etc, gives many people a feeling of depression with accompanying low energy and like moving through molasses.
When I fight this, I really get wore out, but when I allow it to be, trust the 'what is' of my life as I experience it, where I am....amazingly ...all is delightful in its display
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Lack of being, totally being
Total emptiness
Complete lack of interest in almost all previously enjoyed activities
And yet
I am more stable and fine than ever before
Getting to know myself, just as I really am
Just watching my "I"denty
Play out this...and that
And just letting it all arise in complete OKness
All the stuff that I have 'managed' in the past with a host of behaviors, thoughts and emotions.
Its kind of freaky and there arises a judgement about this whole process that I am going through when I look at other people around me and compare myself to them.
And yet I must go on
I cannot turn back
This glow at the center of all that is...attracts me in ways that transcend all other experiences I could contrive.
It has no name
It has no form
It is indistinguishable
Lack of Being, totally being
Complete lack of interest in almost all previously enjoyed activities
And yet
I am more stable and fine than ever before
Getting to know myself, just as I really am
Just watching my "I"denty
Play out this...and that
And just letting it all arise in complete OKness
All the stuff that I have 'managed' in the past with a host of behaviors, thoughts and emotions.
Its kind of freaky and there arises a judgement about this whole process that I am going through when I look at other people around me and compare myself to them.
And yet I must go on
I cannot turn back
This glow at the center of all that is...attracts me in ways that transcend all other experiences I could contrive.
It has no name
It has no form
It is indistinguishable
Lack of Being, totally being
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